5 Simple Tips to Overcome Guilt

“Guilt is anger directed at ourselves – at what we did or did not do.”
~Peter McWilliams

 

Guilt is an emotional warning sign that serves to let us know when we’ve done something wrong.

It’s a self-policing mechanism that we all have.

It helps us to improve our behavior, act in the best interest of society, and avoid making the same mistake twice.

But it can also steal our joy, make us feel miserable, and keep us in a negative mindset.

It can undermine our self-esteem and prevent us from having fulfilling relationships.

Most of us do an amazing job every day – either at work or at home – but still feel plagued by guilt.

How can we overcome these feelings?  How can we determine what feelings are important and beneficial to us, and which ones are not?

 

5 Simple Tips to Overcome Guilt

1) Determine if your guilt is healthy

It takes some self-examination to figure out what you’re feeling guilty about.

Healthy guilt is very beneficial to keeping meaningful relationships.  It prevents us from taking action that could hurt others.

It’s completely rational to feel guilty after saying something hurtful to someone or spending too much time at work instead of with your family.

This guilt is healthy and serves to warn you that either your thoughts, behavior, or morals need to change.

On the other hand, feeling guilty over the actions of others, or when there’s nothing to feel guilty about is not healthy.

As an introvert, I used to feel guilty when I needed to spend some time alone.  This wasn’t me being anti-social, I just needed time to relax and recharge a little.
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3 Virtues of Peter Kassig That We Should All Embody

We sometimes forget that we’re only here for a short time. That all we have is now and that tomorrow is not guaranteed. That our uses of attention and the path we take influence the stories others will tell about us when we’re gone. They determine what kind of memory we will be for people.

I write this with a heavy heart as yet another non-combatant has been murdered by terrorists. His name was Peter Kassig.

 

Peter was an American aid worker from Indiana. The 26 year old Iraq war veteran was kidnapped in 2013 while delivering relief supplies to refugees on the Syrian border. [1]

Peter was destined for great things.  He dedicated his life to helping victims of war.  He found his passion helping those in need and was committed to solving the problems he saw in the world.  He even started his own non-profit.

He put himself in harms way to pursue the well-being and happiness of people that he’d never met before and didn’t need to care about.  He was moved by love and compassion to make a difference; to create a better world.

He was a devoted humanitarian and died wanting others to flourish.  He leaves behind a lasting purpose and significance.  His story will always be told in a positive way, and his accomplishments are truly lasting.

If there was ever someone that modeled the golden rule, it was Peter Kassig.

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Childhood’s End

Where are the soldiers of god for the children in need today. We hear the campaign slogans, protest chants, and Chick tract reiterations for the sanctity of life, the equality of the fetus, and the validity of all life from the moment of conception to birth… But it gets painfully quiet thereafter. The children of the state wander from desolation to squalor within the great absence of morality, permeating the impoverished family unit; mother, father and 1.5 children…

 

Events within the scope of my life and from many first person readings, now rampant within the blogosphere, I have accumulated a sense of disdain and utter chagrin towards the complexity of the broken home, with its satirical legal profitability. Having been spared the pressure of social insecurity by a family, real and complex in it’s own way, that never reached any sort of critical mass to fracture beyond repair; I have thus to relate from behind a fourth wall.
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An Open Letter To Brittany Maynard

Brittany Maynard, who is recently married, has terminal brain cancer. She was told she would have 10 years to live, but then the tumor grew significantly and her time became much shorter. She and her family made the choice to move to Oregon, where she is allowed to “die with dignity.” And no, this does not imply that everyone who does not choose this route is not “dying with dignity.” Its not one extreme or the other.”Dying with dignity” means that a person has the legal right to choose how to end their life when facing a terminal illness. And no, this does not mean that people are for suicide in general. Believe it or not, but there are more than two ways of looking at things. Life is not all black and white, in fact the majority of it is lived in the grey.

Dear Brittany,

 

Thank you. Thank you for using the little time that you have remaining to bring attention to the “death with dignity” debate. I can only imagine the kind of physical, mental and emotional stress that you are currently experiencing. My imagination is not the same, nor could it be even close to the real thing. When I read about your story yesterday, my heart began to fill with an ocean of sadness. It began to swirl with emotions and thoughts as I tried to comprehend the depth and gravity of the situation that you currently find yourself in. It’s a natural reaction, to view another’s situation from your own perspective. Empathy is how we connect to one another; it’s our deepest form of love and understanding. In the vast depth of human emotion, it can be easy for anyone to lose their way. The strong emotional current can swell around us and we become lost in ourselves, lost from the initial response of love that we naturally feel for one another.

 
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Evolutionary Morality: How Empathy is Chicken Soup for Humanity

To begin I would like to preface with the following: the existence of god(s) is not the focal point of this discussion, however uncertain or unprovable. Being of such low probability to effectively be scientifically negligible, when full consideration is given to all of the physical evidence ever collected, for the supernatural I digress. Instead within this discussion the topics I am setting up and ultimately intend to discredit are as follows.

1.) Evolution cannot provide a moral framework since it is a purely “theoretical” biological phenomena.

2.) Morality was given by god(s) through the respective holy texts and cannot be found using any other means or philosophy.

To begin, I would like to warn that I will not be directly commenting on the second assertion until after I have fleshed out my hypothesis for the origins of morality and its most base forms, namely empathy and grief. The way in which I will be doing so is using the evolutionary principles as my biological apparatus. So with no further digressions, “Incipere”.
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